Community guidelines
Talk openly. Stay private. Look out for each other.
The Discreet Careers community is a members-only space for people working in, or looking for work in, the UK adult industry. Here’s how it works, where to post, and the few rules that keep it safe for everyone.
New here?
Start here in three steps
Step 1: Choose a nickname
Pick a name just for the community. Your real name, photos and job applications are never shown.
Step 2: Say hello
The pinned welcome discussion in Starting out is the place to introduce yourself and say what you'd find useful.
Open Starting outStep 3: Ask, answer, share
Join a conversation the team has started, or start your own in whichever space fits best.
Start a discussion
Where to post
Three spaces, one for each kind of question
The Discreet Careers team has started a few conversations in each space to get things going. Jump in, or start your own.
Starting out and finding work
New to the industry or changing roles: getting started, choosing where to work and spotting good and bad offers.
Conversations to join
- What do you wish you’d known before your first shift?
- What makes you trust a job advert?
- Which jobs would you like to see more of here?
Pay and working life
Pay, fees, hours, boundaries and the day-to-day of the work.
Conversations to join
- Commission, house fees and deductions: what do you ask first?
- What questions should you ask before accepting a role?
- What makes a shift pattern work for you?
Independent business support
Working for yourself: tax, admin, marketing, safety and running your own business.
Conversations to join
- Which business task takes up too much of your time?
- If you could hire one person to help, what would they do?
- Which tools help you stay organised?
Discussions are visible to signed-in members only. Posts from the team show the Staff badge.
The rules
Eight rules that keep the community safe
You agree to these when you join. Breaking them can mean a post is removed, posting is paused or access is suspended.
- Rule 1
Adults only
You must be 18 or over. If you think someone in the community may be under 18, report it and we will act straight away.
- Rule 2
Protect everyone's privacy, including your own
Do not post anyone's real name, phone number, address, workplace details, photos of their face, or anything else that could identify them, and think carefully before sharing your own. Do not try to work out who someone is.
- Rule 3
No explicit images or sexual content
Pictures are checked by a moderator before anyone else sees them. Nudity, sexual images and images of other people without their agreement are not allowed. Keep posts about the work, not sexual descriptions.
- Rule 4
No advertising, recruiting or selling
Do not advertise services, recruit for a business, offer bookings, or ask people to contact you elsewhere. Vacancies belong on the jobs board, where employers are checked.
- Rule 5
Be respectful
No harassment, threats, hate, or abuse about anyone's gender, sexuality, race, religion, disability, body or line of work. Disagree with ideas, not people.
- Rule 6
No illegal content, exploitation or coercion
Nothing that encourages crime, exploitation, trafficking, controlling behaviour or anyone being made to work against their will. If you are worried about someone's safety, report it.
- Rule 7
Share experiences, not accusations
Talk about what happened to you and what to look out for. Do not make allegations about named people or businesses here: report a concern about an employer to us instead, so we can look into it properly.
- Rule 8
Advice is from members, not professionals
Members share what worked for them. It is not legal, tax, medical or financial advice. Check anything important with a qualified adviser.
Good posts
- Ask a specific question, and say what you've already tried
- Keep examples general: the situation, not the people or the place
- Mark the replies that helped you as Helpful
- Report a problem instead of arguing in the thread
Please leave out
- Names, faces, workplaces or anything that identifies someone, including you
- Phone numbers, social handles, links to your profiles or referral links
- Adverts, bookings or recruiting for a business
- Allegations about a named person or business (report them to us instead)
How moderation works
Checked by people, with a right to appeal
- 1
First posts are checked
A moderator checks a new member's first post, and every picture, before anyone else sees it.
- 2
Anyone can report
Use Report on a post, reply or profile. The person reported is never told who reported them.
- 3
We act and explain
We can remove a post, lock a discussion, warn, pause posting or suspend access, and we tell you why.
- 4
You can appeal
Disagree with a decision? Appeal it once, within 30 days, from your community settings.
Decisions and appeals are in your community settings.
Your privacy
Pseudonymous, not anonymous
We built the community to be as private as a forum can be. Here is exactly what that means.
Pseudonymous, not anonymous
Other members see only your community nickname, the optional picture and bio you choose, and the month you joined. They never see your name, email, phone, CV, applications, documents or recruitment profile.
Kept separate from your job search
Employers cannot use the community, and nothing in it links your nickname to the applications you make. Your recruitment photos and name are never reused here.
Who can find out who you are
Your nickname is linked to your account behind the scenes. Only a small number of Discreet Careers staff can look that link up, only for a serious reason such as a safety concern or a legal request, and every look-up is recorded.
What you write can be seen by members
Discussions are visible to every signed-in member, and anyone could pass on what they read. Avoid details that would identify you to someone who knows you.
You can download your community data or leave at any time from your community settings. Our privacy policy explains how we handle your information.
If you need help now
In an emergency, call 999
Police, ambulance or fire
Samaritans: 116 123
Free, any time, if you need to talk
Modern Slavery & Exploitation Helpline: 08000 121 700
If you or someone else is being forced to work
National Ugly Mugs
Safety alerts and support for sex workers in the UK
Ready to join the conversation?
Choose a nickname, say hello in the welcome discussion, and ask your first question.